My humble relationship advice for women at 40.
Recently, I had the opportunity to play a round of golf with a female friend of mine and two of her female friends as well. After a great round of golf, we went back to her house where I proceeded to cook dinner for all of us.
3 Circular Saw
Because I was a friend, male and cooking dinner, the ladies seemed to feel very comfortable talking in front of me about their dating lives.
Holy cow. What an eye opener that was.
Let me first start by saying, I am not all that and a bag of chips -far from it actually. I have my hang ups and feel the normal insecurities most of us face on a daily basis.
What I heard and experienced that fateful night at dinner almost made me run screaming from the house.
As the night progressed and wine flowed, I began to see a side of this group of three women that had me questioning if I would ever date again. I have never heard a group of people bitch and gripe about so many people in my entire life. They looked like three Queens, sipping red wine and damning the rest of us who happen to be male to the guillotine.
I felt like asking them if they saw any correlation between the fact they had such impossibly high standards for men and the fact they were all single themselves. Furthermore, it appeared this group of forty something women had never had a serious relationship, either past or present, where they seemed sincerely happy.
I am not suggesting all women are like this.
If however, you find you are approaching forty or on the North side of forty, single and without any prospects for any kind of date soon, you may want to consider the following advice.
If you are looking for perfection from a man then you damn well better bring perfection to the table yourself.
These three women were holding up impossibly high standards that no man could realistically attain.
One woman in the group was obviously very good looking, had a good job, loved golf and seemed very bright. There was a litany of stories from her about failed relationships and unsuccessful dating experiences.
Nice guy, cute, clean and neat, great job but drove a crappy car. Perhaps he didn't see the value in wasting money on a sports car? Perhaps he valued saving some of his money for later in life?
Great guy, great job and great everything else but had a weird haircut and ear hair.
Awesome guy, sincere, respectful, bright, witty and charming but was not well enough endowed.
I'm not suggesting women settle for any reason. None of us should do that. I am saying that we all need to set realistic expectations of what we are looking for in a date.
What would happen if the great guy with the crappy car were given a chance to explain himself? What would happen if Mr. Awesome with the small penis had a good friend who could make livestock weep and cry? If they had given any of these guys half a chance, they may have found their potential dating circle may have expanded nicely.
I have no trouble getting dates. It's not because I am the best looking guy, with a great body, a million dollar bank account, a fantastic car and I could stand in for Ron Jeremy. I get dates because I realize I am far from perfect but I am a sincerely nice person. My expectations for myself are realistic and more importantly, I set realistic expectations for my dates.
We have all heard women pine for the good guys in a relationship, wondering where they are. How come there are no good guys left they seem to constantly complain.
There are nice guys out there. They do exist!
Ladies, you need to give some of us a chance. Dating is a lot like poker; you have to know how to play the cards you have been dealt. You can only bluff for so long. If these women continue to play their hands the way they have been going, it is only a matter of time before someone calls their hand.